I struggled with situational depression throughout the early days of the pandemic. When it was in full swing, every day felt exactly the same - dull, gray, and lacking in any real meaning or motivation. I struggled to work. Art-ing was especially hard. I did my best but it didn't get me very far.
During a particularly energized day I tried to make myself draw something. ANYTHING. I got the outlines done on a little self portrait and went to bed because it wiped me out. The next morning the unfinished drawing resembled an empty coloring book page, so I've spent most days since then adding what I can to the basic outline and stopping when I run out of steam.
I never repeated the same idea twice, which was often most of the battle. Sometimes I let whatever happened on a given day inform what I drew. Other times I'd scribble around with no goal in mind until my energy level or my circumstances made me stop. The story behind each drawing may not always be apparent to the viewer, but it's a visual shorthand for me for whatever was weighing on me the most that day.
The first 30. Adobe Fresco with my iPad Pro and Apple Pencil, often tweaked in Adobe Illustrator with my Wacom Cintiq and my Macbook Pro for gradients and such.
April: My nervous fretting about relationship woes. I had a feeling it was ending.
The day I was dumped, and the two days that followed.
Feeling a little whimsical after being bummed out for a while, so I drew laser eyes just for fun.
Fully vaccinated, I flew to New Orleans for a week in April. Suddenly the world seemed so big after being alone in my apartment for a year.
The first days back with a full classroom of in-person students. I was terrified.
Adjusting to masks all day every day after a year of remote learning. I ate outside and got badly sunburned. Then I had a mask tan. My first set of masks were too rigid and tight so they bruised and cut my face.
An especially intense day of difficult, scary feelings after visiting my mom in the hospital.
